Let’s Talk about Love - My Fortieth Entry

Love has always been difficult for people to define. In fact, it is likely you experience and define love differently from other people. Love is universal; it exists in all human cultures. It feels like a unique adventure to each of us. Since love is a fundamentally an abstract concept it is easier to experience love than to explain it.


So, what is love? This question has been asked by nearly every human being. To fully understand the complex dynamics of this topic would take up a large library, and a lot of space for a blog. We could examine the scope of love, the intensity of love, objects of love and the appropriateness of love. In addition, there is love of God, country, humanity, the arts, or music.



There is love that is seen as selfless, self-centered or manipulative. Some love is conditional - “I’ll love you as long as you do what I want” and some is unconditional - “I love you because you are you.” Love must be considered in context of healthy, addictive, unhealthy and unrequited.
If you feel like saying “enough already,” I understand. Let’s focus on healthy love. First, your heart and your mind must match for healthy love to occur and flourish. You want to feel love and experience being loved for your connection to be healthy.


There are a number of types of love that are observed within committed relationships. These can all be important components of a partnership. Samples of different types of relationship love include:


Romantic love – can be brief but intense. This type of love includes the sexual passion couples often experience early in their relationship.


Compassionate love - is the intimacy of a close, comfortable, trusting companion. A maturing relationship must include this.


Unselfish love - includes devotion, duty and self sacrifice.


Logical love - includes the methodical focused connection between people.


Superficial love - is really the love of the chase or the seduction, rather than the person

What happens when you love differently than your partner? Can you still be compatible? The answer is MAYBE. Partnerships between best friends (compassionate love) make good couples, as will two logical lovers or a combination of a compassionate lover and a logical lover. On the other hand if one person feels romantic while the other person feels compassion there is likely to be a mismatch.


To find happiness in a relationship, you must understand your love style and what types of love you need and want.


Today’s Truth: Don’t expect your partner to be psychic, tell them what you need.